Technology Love/Hate

Just to preface, I realize that much of what I'm about to say makes me sound like I'm 70. But maybe that's not so bad. I hope to be just like this grouchy dame when I'm 70:

So I've succumbed. I held out for quite a while, but now my iphone 4 is in the mail and should be in my hands in 7-14 days. I said for a very long time that I would never get one and didn't want one at all. But recently the opportunity to have one without having a higher phone bill was placed in my lap. I don't think I would have succumbed if not for that opportunity. Don't get me wrong though, I have not been above wanting one lately. They are just BA- there's no way around it. I won't tell you all the features I am excited about, you can go to the apple website for that. It will be quite a change for me, considering I have never ever owned a phone that wasn't the free one that comes with signing up for a plan. Heck, I still don't even text very fast. (I know, reference above picture.)

However, here is the list of reasons I dread the beautiful device's arrival:

1. Paired with my dark-framed glasses, it will nearly complete the uniform of a hipster d-bag. Gross. (This is why I will never buy TOMS shoes no matter how much I like them. It would form a hipster trifecta that there is no recovering from.)
2. I will automatically look like I have that air of superiority. You know the one- it's the attitude of a mac person. Which I have technically been for years, but the iphone is just such a walking commercial.
3. I will probably start playing time-wasting word games. I hate that. But I will love it. 
4. I will become somewhat rude. This is what I am most afraid of. I have complained to my husband countless times about him having his nose in his iphone at the wrong times in social situations and with my family. He's really not that bad. I'm just a little sensitive about it, probably just to make a point about why I don't like iphones and the way they make you uber connected in a way that you can't shut-off. My how the worm has turned. 
5. I don't want to become all addicted and stuff. These iPhone people are like crack addicts. Every time a new one comes out and "changes everything," (really? are you really changing the world?  BS.) you hear about people waiting in line at the AT&T stores for hours and hours. Would it really be that bad to wait a week or two? But I can already feel the high-tech hunger growing in me in subtle ways. I have even wanted an iPad, of all ridiculous things, ever since I saw this video. (It just makes it seem crafty somehow!)

Anyway, I know some of these on the list are my weird way of worrying to much about what people think about me, and the others are completely in my control. There is nothing inherently wrong with the dumb thing, and I don't have to be that into it if I don't want to be. I guess I just feel like I'm giving up a little bit of the old lady in me who wants to abandon civilization and live on a farm, sipping home brewed beer and painting pictures. Maybe I will just have to do something else to balance her out, like plant a garden or stop shaving my underarms.